Anticipation

In 10 minutes I leave for work, but I'm not thinking about the 8 hours in my immediate future.  No, I'm thinking ahead to the Nursing Program orientation afterward.  It too is 8 hours...  An 8 hour glimpse into the next 2 years of my life...  What will it bring?  New friends?  New insights?  Knowledge and skill?  I hope so.

I feel I've been out of touch with my own life for a while now.  Guess that doesn't make a lot of sense, but it's the best way I can describe it.  I love my life, but it's been somewhat dream-like the past few years (and somewhat nightmarish for several years before that).  It hasn't been entirely real, and it hasn't been entirely mine.

At some point I got off track in my life, and things just began happening.  I became more of an observer and less an active participant.  I suppose that's my natural inclination unless I work hard to counter it-- I have a tendency to watch from the sidelines.

I want control back.

I hope the orientation tomorrow is a good day.  I hope I leave the campus having made connections with my classmates-to-be and with a sense of excitement for this new undertaking.  Classes officially begin in just over two months.  I don't feel completely ready, but I plan to be!  Wish me luck.